This is not a drill, working here causes some real side effects. For anyone thinking of applying, or even spending too much time on our Instagram and TikTok, we thought we’d warn you of the very real dangers of associating with us.
Side effects include but are not limited to:
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Getting tattoos: This one is real. So many people get inked up within the first year of working here. There was even one day where a group of 8+ people went to Minneapolis just to get some tats together! Fave artists are Shannon from Old North Tattoo, Jess from Staghorn Tattoo, and Jonah from Wintership Tattoo!
- Drinking too much caffeine: Jess’s go-to Starbucks order is a Brown Sugar Shaken Espresso with cold foam and she’s unfortunately gotten everyone else in the office to love them too. The addiction is real.
- Becoming a plant-parent: Whether you kill it or not, you’ll own some plants. Only real plants are acceptable around these parts. Especially now that we have Parker Pots (He's our plant guy– YES we have a plant caretaker on payroll, lol)!
- Binging cult/murder docs: We will all watch the same doc and then talk about it like it’s the latest hot goss. Some binge-worthy docs that came recommended by Britlyn (company murder/cult doc expert... also lead maker) are Keep Sweet, Pray and Obey, Cult of Mother God, The Jinx, and How to Fix a Drug Scandal.
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Binging reality TV: Bachelor nation or Survivor, anyone?
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Yoga: Many of us have joined a yoga studio in town since starting at Hello Adorn. Multiple yoga teachers work here, and the rest of us love going to their classes. Jess + Adam offer us a wellness stipend and lots of us use that on yoga!!
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Running a half marathon: If you work here, ya just might end up getting roped into something to do with running or walking competitively. Last year we had a team run the Eau Claire Half Marathon together, and lots of us participate in the Good Soul 5k every year! We also have a step-competition every spring and you wouldn't believe the number of steps these people take in order to win.
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Skiing (like a girl): Our girl Kimmie owns a company called Ski Like a Girl, and by proxy so many of us like to get after it and go skiing a few times each winter.
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Wearing neutrals: Your wardrobe can and will be affected by working here. If it’s not the Free People sold at Flagship, then it’s the periodic clothing swap that trends your closet towards beige tones.
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Swearing more: In Lizzie’s words, “If you work here, you’ll get a potty mouth.”
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Strong fingers: This one is maker-specific. Makers tend to get super strong fingers from forging metal all day. If you need a pickle jar opened, we’ve got the gals for you.
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Taylor Swift: You might not turn into a full-fledged swiftie, but you WILL RESPECT HER.
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Old Navy + Target Circle: Your closet will likely be filled with Old Navy and you’ll join Target Circle for the deals (we love to shop deals). We also generally share a lot of our finds on a work channel called #gatekeeping so if someone has something you like on, the whole company can know where you got it. It's not uncommon for a few of us to have the same pair of pants on any given day.
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Parking tickets: You’ll get ‘em.
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You might have a glow up: What can we say, all of us are shining stars even on our bad days.
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Twinning via outfit and/or name: We’ve got double Maggies, double Jess’, and double Olivias. Sometimes their clothes match unintentionally too.
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IBS: idk why but we got tummy issues up in here. We're all just discovering probiotics so stay tuned for us to have a happy tummy summer (who needs hot girl summer, right?).
- You're a girls girl (even the boys here are girls girls): In severe cases you might even experience the compulsion to compliment every outfit you see.
Prognosis:
- Get yourself a sweet treat after lunch.
- Get your color season done.
- Add MORE caffeine to your diet– it will cancel out the caffeine you had earlier today.
- A digestion walk: nothing like a little walkie-poo to help your Old Navy addiction.
- Watch Shark Tale 2x and learn to impersonate the shrimp (iykyk).
- Sit in a wicker chair.
- Wear some 14k gold fill. #notanad.
